Do The Best You Can

So I decided to take a little break from blogging a while back and now I can't access my other blog. I guess it got deleted off of blogger because I hadn't logged on in X amount of days. So...Im starting over? Good and bad I guess!

Ask me why I took a break? I don't even know. It felt nice though.

Mothers Day was a couple days ago and Im just now getting a chance to think about it. It was a nice day, Alex and Crew spoiled me...with a new pillow. We went downtown to Chicago and walked around, and then it started pouring rain...so we ran back to the train station to find out we took the wrong train and missed the right one. So we were stuck...but we were with good company so it was ok! Crew was hard that day, not hard, just a handful I guess. He loved getting outside and seeing all of the people and traffic. That stimulation is good for him...but Im not sure if we will get to the city that often.

I really do love being a mom. It is the most rewarding calling I will ever have. Recently I have been bogged down a little (ok a lot) with my role and calling as a mother though. I look around me and see so many women who are accomplished at their age. Im 20 with 1.5 kids...plugging through school, sometimes don't wear makeup, sit in pjs all day, maybe run a few errands, and hardly make dinner. Yeah...you could say I didn't feel the best about myself until I brought up my feelings to the hubs. He said some things that reassured me of this calling in life. Lately I look down at my growing belly and then see the toddler whining and clinging to my legs. I think "what did I get myself into" haha That sounds pretty bad. Im just amazed that at my young age I have almost 2 KIDS! That's crazy! I was a stellar babysitter...so I thought I had this motherhood thing in the bag. My mom made it look so easy dealing with us and mothering us...so obviously I could do it. Boy was I wrong! I already feel so helpless somedays when Crew is literally whining all day, and my body is in pain from carrying a little human inside. She isn't even born yet and Im already feeling this way.

I am so overwhelmed with how much I need to teach my children. I can only hope and pray that they love and listen to me...but not only me, their Heavenly Father. Crew has FINALLY started to say "please" when we ask him to. It might not seem like a big deal but it is to us. We have a tiny window to teach kids manners from a young age...so when he would just yell "NO!" when we asked him, I was devastated. Great. I already failed at something and he isn't even 2. Im just so glad that we stuck to our guns and made him say please, because now he says it in the sweetest little voice. He really is good natured and a sweet little boy. I just get so overwhelmed with how much energy he has.

After feeling so down about some things and trying to get over it...Crew would not go to sleep last night. Great. I was so looking forward to a bath, my book and bed after a long long day. Selfish I know! There was a loud thunderstorm so he was pretty scared. He kept asking for "pop" which is the popcorn song that he loves and a few other books. He was so cuddly and sweet with me. I felt so much love for my calling in that moment. How lucky am I to be the one to console my children when they need it most? How lucky am I to be the one to sing their favorite song to them? How lucky am I to be able to kiss their "owies" and they magically go away? This calling is truly a blessing in my life. I have always known that this is what I was meant to do. Im just a young mom who needs to be reminded sometimes of that.

I am aware that harder times will come...especially after the baby is born. My children will be little for only a short time, so I just need to laugh during the hard times, order take-out when dinner just isn't happening, and start over the next day with a better attitude! I am so grateful that I can do this with my sweet husband by my side too. He is my biggest fan and always gives me the best compliments, and encouragement.

"Do the best you can through these years, but whatever else you do, cherish that role that is so uniquely yours and for which heaven itself sends angels to watch over you and your little ones."-Elder Holland

That quote came from one of my most favorite talks ever given...of course by Elder Holland. I know that this time in our lives will end so quickly. I will be in my clean house one day just wishing that I had little handprints all over the appliances, toys strewn throughout the house, and snacks left out for me to step on and smash. (ok maybe not the snack part) 

xoxo